'Talent' returns with new shock-jock judge Stern
Monday
"How I Met Your Mother" 7 p.m., CBS: It's birth to the future in the Season 7 closer as Lily goes into labor and the show fast-forwards to Barney's wedding.
"Bones" 7 p.m., Fox: Co-star David Boreanaz helms Season 7's conclusion.
"America's Got Talent" 7 p.m., NBC: Tune in to see if new judge Howard Stern collapses society and ruins our youth. (Read our preview, published Saturday in Life & Arts, at austin360.com.)
"Two and a Half Men" 8 p.m., CBS: Season 9 - Ashton Kutcher's best season on the show - wraps up tonight.
"The Bachelorette" 8:30 p.m., ABC: It's former Brad Womack squeeze Emily Maynard's turn to look for love on TV, and why not? It worked so well the first time.
"Mike & Molly" 8:30 p.m., CBS: A season-ending wedding? Looks like the writers stopped at "something old."
"Hawaii Five-0" 9 p.m., CBS: Find out who kicks the coconut in tonight's second season finale.
"Smash" 9 p.m., NBC: The curtain drops on Season 1.
Tuesday
"NCIS" 7 p.m., CBS: The ninth season wraps up with a terrorism scare. I hope it's not an underwater underwear bomb.
"90210" 7 p.m., the CW: Season 4 is over, and these hot bodies can hit the beach for a few months.
"NCIS: Los Angeles" 8 p.m., CBS: Season 3 concludes.
"Private Practice" 9 p.m., ABC: Season 5 ends.
"Fashion Star" 9 p.m., NBC: A first-season winner is named, and I guess the other two remaining contestants get a dressing down.
Wednesday
"Nature" 7 p.m., PBS: Tonight's episode is called "Cracking the Koala Code." I can see why that answer would be a bit fuzzy.
"Suburgatory" 7:30 p.m., ABC: The freshman season concludes with a mother of a celebration.
"Criminal Minds" 8 p.m., CBS: Season 7 says farewell. Unfortunately, so does Paget Brewster.
Thursday
"Missing" 7 p.m., ABC: Will Becca save her son? Season one concludes tonight.
"Community" 7 p.m., NBC: It's a veritable community of "Community!" This is the first of three episodes tonight. The season finale airs at 8:30 p.m.
"Rules of Engagement" 7:30 p.m., CBS: Season 6 concludes.
"Grey's Anatomy" 8 p.m., ABC: A number of key players' contracts are up - including Meredith's and McDreamy's - and creator Shonda Rhimes has promised a shocking death in tonight's eighth season wrap-up.
"Person of Interest" 8 p.m., CBS: The FBI homes in on Reese in the first season finale.
"Scandal" 9 p.m., ABC: A short Season 1 comes to a close.
"The Mentalist" 9 p.m., CBS: It's sort of "Leaving Las Vegas" as the show signs off for the summer.
"Awake" 9 p.m., NBC: Part one of season-ending two-parter finds conspiracies emerging in each of Britten's realities.
Friday
"Shark Tank" 7 p.m., ABC: The third season winds down with pitches for fountain of youth products and recycled tennis shoes.
"Who Do You Think You Are?" 7 p.m., NBC: A search of Paula Deen's bloodline is inconclusive, probably because of all the Crisco.
"Nikita" 7 p.m., the CW: Division's destruction looms in the second season finale.
"Grimm" 8 p.m., NBC: As Season 1 wraps up, bodies continue to pile up in Portland.
"Supernatural" 8 p.m., the CW: Season 7 ends.
Saturday
"MLB Baseball" 6 p.m., Fox: The Rangers take on the Astros in Houston.
"Masterpiece Mystery" 8 p.m., PBS: Tonight's "Sherlock" updates "The Hound of the Baskervilles" with a secret military base and animal experimentation.
Sunday
"Billboard Music Awards" 7 p.m., ABC: "Modern Family's" Phil and Claire, Ty Burrell and Julie Bowen, host. Carrie Underwood, Justin Bieber and others perform.
"The Simpsons" 7 p.m., Fox: Lady Gaga guests on the Season 23 (count 'em!) closer.
"Bob's Burgers" 7:30 p.m., Fox: Season 2 ends.
"Jesse Stone: Benefit of the Doubt" 8 p.m., CBS: Tom Selleck's TV movie hero rumbles with the mob.
"Family Guy" 8 p.m., Fox: Seth McFarlane appears to be aping "The Simpsons" again as mini-episodes close out Season 10.
"Celebrity Apprentice" 8 p.m., NBC: A winner is revealed tonight, but I'm using that term loosely.