Fall TV preview

Networks, take notes

Learn a lesson from last year: Dramas have got to hook us. Comedies need to stand out if you want to pass the test with viewers

By Diane Holloway
AMERICAN-STATESMAN TELEVISION WRITER
Friday, August 25, 2006

Listen up, class. Pay attention. I'm talking to you, network programmers, so stop checking your stock tickers and take a seat.

Last season was a bit of a bust, wasn't it? Only a handful of the new shows earned passing grades and were invited back for a sophomore year. The sci-fi offerings disappeared into a parallel universe of their own.

The latest batch of offerings show noticeable improvement in the drama categories, but you're still pretty weak when it comes to comedy. Buckle down, folks, and focus. If you had paid attention to last season's funny hits, namely "My Name Is Earl" and "The Office," you might have learned something. We really don't need another round of twentysomething goofiness.

As for dramas, well, you've probably got way too many serials on the course schedule. No matter how many viewers fall in love with "Kidnapped," "Jericho" or "Runaway," there's just no way to keep track of so many continuing plot lines. Skipped episodes will equal mass confusion and, ultimately, overload. The dropout rate for serials, I predict, will be substantial.

A bit more variety in your course offerings will serve you well next time, but for the sake of your audience, let's analyze what's coming up this fall.

BASIC DRAMA 202

Goal: To amuse, entertain and grab viewers otherwise unwilling to commit to the season's avalanche of weekly serials.

Let's review:

"Standoff" (8 p.m. Sept. 5; moves to 7 p.m. in October; Fox) — Ron Livingston and Rosemarie DeWitt play FBI crisis negotiators secretly sleeping together. Completely uninteresting despite cute cast. Grade: D

"Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" (9 p.m. Sept. 18, NBC) — Everything from concept to execution of this darkly humorous drama smacks of excellence. Creator Aaron Sorkin brings us behind-the-scenes wit and turmoil at a late-night comedy show that looks a whole lot like "Saturday Night Live." Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford are superb as a writer-producer team. Grade: A

"Smith" (9 p.m. Sept. 19, CBS) — A weary concept (the secret lives of high-class thieves) but a fabulous cast. Ray Liotta is the chief thief; Virginia Madsen is his wife, who allegedly doesn't know how he earns all that money. Good chemistry and production values. Grade: C+

"Shark" (9 p.m. Sept. 21, CBS) — A one-note legal drama with James Woods as a hyperkinetic guy emitting the one, ear-splitting note. The young attorneys he bosses around aren't the slightest bit interesting, so we're left with the overbearing Woods as an egotistical defense attorney turned do-good prosecutor. Grade: C

"Men in Trees" (8 p.m. Fridays, debuts 9 p.m. Sept. 12, ABC) — Think "Northern Exposure" from a female perspective. Anne Heche is delightful in this romantic comedy-drama about an advice author who is dumped by her fiancé and winds up finding happiness in the wilds of Alaska. Grade: B+

"Brothers & Sisters" (9 p.m. Sept. 24, ABC) — No preview. Hard to imagine a family drama starring Calista Flockhart, Rachel Griffiths, Sally Field and Patricia Wettig could be anything but riveting. Keeping fingers crossed for this one, which casts the former Ally McBeal as a conservative radio talk-show host. Grade: Incomplete.

"Heroes" (8 p.m. Sept. 25, NBC) — Ordinary people discover they have extraordinary powers: a cheerleader whose body is indestructible, a drug-addled artist who paints the future, a politician who can fly, etc. There are way too many of these freaky folks to keep track of, and they're not doing anything particularly heroic. Grade: D

"Friday Night Lights" (7 p.m. Oct. 3, NBC) — Our very own Austin-based production is a terrific spin off the 2004 film of Buzz Bissinger's book. Updated to today and based on the Texas high-school football culture in fictional Dillon, the series boasts terrific football scenes but also characters, including players and a coach (well-played by Kyle Chandler), worth spending quality time with. Grade: A

"Justice" (8 p.m. Wednesday, Fox) — Victor Garber plays a dream-team lawyer who wades through media-hot, high-profile cases. Loud, over-played and desperately disappointing. Garber's considerable talents are wasted on this hokey melodrama. Grade: D

SERIAL DRAMA 424

Goal: To ride coattails of "24" and "Lost" and make appointment keepers out of hordes of sometime viewers.

Let's review:

"Vanished" (8 p.m. Mondays; premiered Aug. 21; Fox) — A poor relation to "24," with cartoonish characters and lousy acting. A Georgia senator's wife is abducted. That part is good. The senator, a grumpy FBI agent and a pushy TV reporter try to find her and unravel the mystery of who she really is. This part, which is the series, is not so good. Grade: C

"Jericho" (7 p.m. Sept. 20, CBS) — A mushroom cloud appears on the horizon and a tiny town in Kansas finds itself cut off from the world. What happened? And why? Gerald McRaney and Skeet Ulrich are good in this grimly intriguing yarn. Grade: B+

"Kidnapped" (9 p.m. Sept. 20, NBC) — The best in the whole bowl of new serials. Tim Hutton and Dana Delany are the wealthy parents of an abducted teenage boy. Delroy Lindo is the cop trying to help; Jeremy Sisto is the professional helper working outside the law. The cinematic quality of this show is exceptional, as is the storytelling. Grade: A

"Six Degrees" (9 p.m. Sept. 21, ABC) — A web of separate coincidences connects six pretty New Yorkers. You know, the old six-degrees-of-separation myth. The pilot is confusing but sometimes interesting. It comes from the producers of "Lost" and "Alias," so maybe it'll get better. Grade: C+

"Runaway" (8 p.m. Sept. 25, CW) — Dark and intriguing, this saga of a man on the lam looks more like an independent film than a TV show. Donnie Wahlberg plays the wrongly accused, who takes his family with him as he flees to prove his innocence. Grade: B+

"The Nine" (9 p.m. Oct. 4, ABC) — Flashbacks, flash-forwards and everything in between are signatures of this strange tale of nine people caught in a bank robbery and subsequent 52-hour hostage crisis. Enjoyable but possibly too many characters. Tim Daly, Kim Raver and Chi McBride headline an exceptional cast. Grade: B

"Day Break" (8 p.m. Nov. 15, ABC) — Taye Diggs is terrific as a detective framed for murder who finds himself caught in a time warp, living the same awful day over and over until he can figure out what happened. Will the "Groundhog Day" concept hold up over time? Maybe. Grade: B+

"Desire" and "Fashion House" (9 and 10 p.m., respectively, Sept. 5, MyNetworkTV) — If you're a fan of Spanish-language telenovelas and daytime soaps, you might enjoy these nightly serials. Beautiful people flirting and strutting but not flexing any performance muscles. Grade: D

COMEDY 202

Goal: To produce laughter, viable reruns and lucrative syndication.

Let's review:

" 'Til Death" (7 p.m. Sept. 7, Fox) — Brad Garrett and Joely Fisher are a grumpy married couple ("Marriage isn't about having fun," he muses. "It's about having someone to drive you to the hospital . . ."). Depressing, not funny and oh-so-boring. Grade: D

"Happy Hour" (7:30 p.m. Sept. 7, Fox) — No preview. A couple of twentysomething guys, one jaded and the other romantic, share an apartment in Chicago. Oy. Grade: Incomplete.

"The Class" (7 p.m. Sept. 18, CBS) — Pilot starts off with an interrupted suicide, which really is pretty funny, but it's mostly downhill from there. Jason Ritter heads a huge ensemble of twentysomethings who get together for a reunion of their third-grade class and reconnect in oh-so-hilarious ways. Grade: C

"Help Me Help You" (8:30 p.m. Sept. 26, ABC) — Ted Danson is funny again as a recently divorced group therapist and best-selling author. Actually, what lifts this sitcom from chuckle to guffaw is the supporting cast of misfits in his group. Grade: B

"Ugly Betty" (7 p.m. Sept. 28, ABC) — Based on the wildly popular Spanish-language series "Yo Soy Betty, la Fea," this hourlong comedy is warm-hearted, sweet and very funny. America Ferrera is destined for major stardom as the normal-sized Latina girl in the pencil-thin world of a high-fashion magazine. A superb, stylish-looking show with real meat on its bones. Grade: A

"The Game" (7:30 p.m. Oct. 1, CW) — Lots of wisecracks but not much else. A stereotypical look at cocky NFL players and their gum-popping trophy girlfriends and wives, including an interracial couple and a bug-eyed innocent. Grade: D

"Twenty Good Years" (7 p.m. Oct. 4, NBC) — Jeffrey Tambor and John Lithgow as middle-aged, over-the-top wackos who decide life is passing them by, so they do fun things like run around in their underwear and jump in the ocean. Considering the combined talent of these two guys, this show is simply tragic. Grade: D

"30 Rock" (7:30 p.m. Oct. 11, NBC) — Alec Baldwin as a pushy, bottom-line obsessed network exec is terrific, Tracy Morgan is brilliant as an unpredictable movie star recruited to TV, but somehow Tina Fey just doesn't pull this all together. She created the show and plays the live sketch comedy's head writer (as she was in real life on "Saturday Night Live"). Needs work. Grade: C

"The Knights of Prosperity" (8 p.m. Oct. 17, ABC) — Formerly known as "Let's Rob . . . " and still awaiting a permanent title, the offbeat premise and equally offbeat cast are just plain funny. Lumpy Donal Logue is a janitor who persuades his pals to embark on a big-dream plan to break into Mick Jagger's New York apartment and swipe his luxurious stuff. Mick is campy and fun in the pilot, but don't expect to see him in future episodes. Nevertheless, this show clicks on nearly all cylinders. Grade: B+

Intro to comparative 'SNL'

'30 Rock'

• Inspiration: 'Saturday Night Live'
• Genre: sitcom
• Creative force: Tina Fey ('Saturday Night Live')
• Stars: Fey, Rachel Dratch, Tracy Morgan, Alec Baldwin
• Concept: Behind-the-scenes hysteria at a live sketch-comedy show like 'Saturday Night Live.'

'Studio 60'

• Inspiration: 'Saturday Night Live'
• Genre: drama
• Creative force: Aaron Sorkin ('The West Wing')
• Stars: Matthew Perry, Bradley Whitford, Steven Weber, Sarah Paulson, D.L. Hughley, Timothy Busfield
• Concept: Behind-the-scenes romance, politics and conflict at a popular late-night sketch comedy show like 'Saturday Night Live.'

Bottom line

• The two are nothing alike. One's a sitcom; the other a drama. More importantly, one is really good ('Studio 60') and one isn't ('30 Rock').

dholloway@statesman.com; 445-3608