Bowling nirvana

Dollar Mania night at Dart Bowl draws diverse crowd in quest for the perfect game, or passing the time.

By Peter Mongillo
AMERICAN-STATESMAN STAFF
Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Between 7:30 and 8 p.m. on a Monday, a steady stream of people forms a line that grows until it is 60 or 70 strong. They range from the young (kids of 9 or 10) to middle age, from undergraduates adorned in burnt orange to people sporting mohawks and nose rings and everything in between.

Some sit on the ground, some lean against the wall.

Everyone there understands: They will be in the same place for at least an hour.

No, this is not the line to get tickets to a free My Morning Jacket show, or Polvo's, or whatever else people in Austin seem eager to queue up for — this is Dollar Mania night at Dart Bowl, and the prize is a quintet of bowling booty: $1 games, shoes, nachos, hot dogs and sodas. The 1998 Coen brothers cult movie "The Big Lebowski" presents bowling as a metaphor for life — "Strikes and gutters, ups and downs," says Jeff Bridges' Dude. Judging by the consistent crowd at Dollar Mania, there may be some truth to the Coens' mythology of bowling as the center of the universe. Some people are here to release stress after working all day, some to spend time with friends and some for the eternal struggle of trying to reach the nirvana of a perfect game.

Alicia Ramirez, 19, is the desk attendant whose duty includes a weekly stint on the Monday night shift. She started working at the alley when her parents would no longer pay her league fees. In the two or so years that dollar night has been going on, Ramirez says, there have been only about four slow nights. As we look out at the line, wrapping around the small main lobby (which doubles as a bowling museum, stocked with everything from old-fashioned pins to high-heeled bowling shoes), Ramirez points out that once the line gets past the arcade, about 30 or 40 feet from the desk, those people will probably have to wait until 10:30 or 11 p.m. to get a lane.

At the front of the line is Rex Mueller, a tall, thin man in his mid-20s wearing a backward white Longhorns baseball hat. He's joined by his friend Andie Stanfield. This is Stanfield's first night at Dollar Mania, but Mueller explains that he has been coming to bowl every Monday for the past six months; it's the only weeknight he goes out. The two have been in line since about 7:30 for the 9 p.m. start time. Most in line agree that if you want to be guaranteed a lane, you need to be there by 7:45. New dollar night denizens continue to roll in well after 8:30; they're told they can put their names on the waiting list.

Waiting bowlers each have their own thing going to pass the time. Option one is a sort of improvised tailgate operation, where groups of friends loiter and catch up as they drink 16-ounce tall boys of Pabst Blue Ribbon ($3), the most popular refreshment choice. Others are reading, writing, listening to MP3 players, and playing poker or even backgammon.

About 8:45 the line begins moving, lanes are assigned, but bowling does not begin until exactly 9 p.m. Ramirez announces the rules over the scratchy PA system: Do not smoke inside, do not drink outside and do not cross the foul line. Oh, and one more thing — do not go near the league. There is a big sign to remind everyone of this. Some nights you might see yellow police-style tape separating the league players from the dollar maniacs.

Those in attendance are not opposed to league play. Some bowlers, such as John Hooker, a researcher in geology at the University of Texas, have participated in leagues but didn't have the time to commit and turned to the more casual confines of Monday nights. Hooker and his three friends, who formerly bowled together as the "Beer Barons" (see "The Simpsons," Season Eight), have been rolling on Mondays for the past two years. The Barons even play a card game to make the experience more interesting — draw one card for a spare, two for a strike. Whoever has the best poker hand at the end of the game wins a beer.

Creating a pseudonym under which to bowl is a ritual for many during Dollar Mania. Group themes are popular — the Beer Barons go with types of lumber (the keyboard on their lane is malfunctioning so it doesn't work out as they planned); there's also a group of mixed drinks (Roy Rogers, White Russian and a few others not suitable for print). Animals, natural disasters and dead rock stars are among the other groupings in the Dart Bowl taxonomy. First-in-line Rex Mueller says that he bowled his best game, 268, under the name "Rexamillion."

Aside from the obvious discount, reasons for attending Dollar Mania are as diverse as the made-up names. Matt Marrero, a co-worker of Mueller's at Eyemasters in Barton Creek Square mall, who joins him once lanes had been assigned (another Dollar Mania strategy: Get your friends to wait in line), explains that "it's all about the competition."

Daniel Ruszkiewicz, another co-worker and an undergraduate in advertising at the University of Texas, extols the virtues of knocking down pins as a way to blow off steam after working and studying all day.

Yet another Beer Baron, Garrett McKenna, points to the challenge of the game as a reason he keeps coming back. "I haven't rolled the perfect game yet," he says. Hooker jokingly concentrates his competitive spirit outward, explaining that much of the joy of the game comes from "the symbolism of beating your friends."

It isn't all fun and games on the lanes. A group of Spider House employees, who were in line about 8:15, are still waiting for a lane at 10:30 p.m., one of about 10 parties on Ramirez's waiting list, which grew steadily all night. Many pass the time drinking beer or standing in front of the building smoking cigarettes. It doesn't seem hopeful for those on the end of the list, and Ramirez says it's a challenge to get people to leave at midnight.

As a wise man once said, sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes, well, he eats you.

pmongillo@statesman.com

GET YOUR BOWL ON

Dart Bowl

700 Grover Ave. 452-2518, www.dartbowl.com

9 a.m. to midnight Sunday-Thursday; 9 a.m. to 1:30 a.m. Friday-Saturday

Old-school Austin alley is packed with bowling kitsch. Don't miss Dollar Mania from 9 p.m. to midnight Mondays for $1 lanes, shoes, nachos, hot dogs and sodas. Get there by 8 p.m. if you want to get on a lane, however.

Highland Lanes

8909 Burnet Road. 458-1215, www.highlandlanes.com

9:30 a.m. to midnight Sunday-Thursday; 9:30 a.m. to 1:30 a.m. Friday-Saturday

Get your psychedelic ya-yas out from 9 p.m. to midnight Tuesdays with Electric Bowl, complete with black lights, rock music and a fog machine. $8 a person.

Westgate Lanes

2701 W. William Cannon Drive. 441-2695, www.westgatelanes.net

9 a.m. to midnight Sunday-Thursday; 9 a.m. to 2 a.m. Friday and Saturday

Sports its own dollar night from 9 p.m. to midnight Sundays, with $1 lanes, shoes, sodas, nachos and hotdogs.

300 Austin

9504 N. Interstate 35. 834-7733, www.3hundred.com

Noon to midnight Monday-Thursday; noon to 2 a.m. Friday; 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. Saturday; 11 a.m. to midnight Sunday

The 300 claims to be 'a trendy club,' 'a hot new bistro' and 'an upscale sports bar' all rolled into one. You be the judge of whether those things belong in a bowling alley.

Main Event Entertainment

13301 U.S. 183 N. 401-0000, www.maineventusa.net

11 a.m. to 2 a.m. Monday; 11 a.m. to midnight Tuesday-Thursday; 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. Friday; 10 a.m. to 2 a.m. Saturday; 11 a.m. to midnight Sunday

The alley here shares space with a rock climbing area, billiards, laser tag, something called 'Glow Golf' and a bar. Also offers black-light bowling, known here as 'Laser Jam.'