'Taxi': Going Nowhere Fast

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By Lisa Rose
Newark Star-Ledger

Posted: October 8, 2004

In "Taxi," Queen Latifah admonishes Jimmy Fallon, "Stop trying so hard."

One wishes he would listen.

Making his debut as a leading actor, the former "Saturday Night Live" newsreader is desperately unfunny. He virtually yodels his dialogue, seemingly convinced that he can wring laughter from the lamest punch lines by raising his pitch a few octaves.

Sure, his character isn't supposed to be the sharpest tool in the shed, but the way his mouth flaps wildly while his eyes glaze over, he appears to be suffering from severe head trauma. And the audience is right there suffering along with him.

"Taxi" has nothing to do with Reverend Jim and Latka Gravas. If only it were related to the classic same-titled sitcom. Instead, it's a retread of a 1998 French action-comedy. While the original was an amusing diversion, the new film, set in New York, is like going nowhere for 90-plus minutes with the meter running.

The French flick, from Luc Besson ("La Femme Nikita"), concerned a pizza deliveryman who takes a new job driving a cab and gets caught up in a police officer's pursuit of a bank-robbing gang.

The American version of the tale is directed by Tim Story ("Barbershop") and was initially going to star Ice Cube as the speedy cabby. After he dropped from the project, the character was revamped for Latifah. She plays Belle Williams, a former bike messenger who dreams of NASCAR competitions but is content at the moment to perform such amazing stunts as getting a fare from Times Square to Kennedy Airport in nine minutes.

Meanwhile, Detective Andy Washburn (Fallon) barely knows his gas pedal from his elbow, and loses his driver's license after plowing into a bodega. He's supposedly a super-sleuth with a gift for undercover work, but all we see is a botched sting operation in which he strains to be Cuban and delivers such nonsensical threats as "I'm gonna put a window in him."

Andy and Belle cross paths amid Midtown gridlock, as he jumps in her cab when he hears of a bank robbery in progress nearby. The culprits are four Brazilian women who use their cover-girl looks to distract potential captors. (Somehow this is reminiscent of "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.")

There is lots of buckle-up action, with Andy and Belle racing after the crooks through the outer boroughs and North Jersey, all of the roads looking suspiciously like I-10 near Los Angeles. The two banter along the way, Belle seething, "I hate your guts," while Andy bursts into Natalie Cole songs and keeps losing his badge.

Pity Ann-Margret, cast as Andy's comically alcoholic mother, and Jennifer Esposito, playing his shrew of a boss/ex-girlfriend.

Latifah is convincing in her part, if only because she seems genuinely annoyed with her co-star. Viewers can really sympathize when she repeatedly snaps, "Shut up!"