Then they disappear at the opening credits.

The "Ring" parody continues throughout, however, thinning itself as it goes like worn VHS tape as guest stars including Queen Latifah and George Carlin parade through the film in mostly uninspired bits before going away again as the film fires scattershot at easy targets like "Signs" and "8 Mile" before crawling toward the land of diminishing comedic returns.

"Scary Movie," the first film in the series, was funny because it parodied "Scream," a meta horror film that itself was wryly funny. But there were still plenty of horror film clichés to skewer. "Scary Movie 2" veered toward the scatological with Shawn and Marlon Wayans taking up more screen time and amping up the film's mean-spiritedness.

"Scary Movie 3" does something I never thought a film could: It makes me miss the Wayans brothers.

Taking the helm is director David Zucker of "Airplane!" and the "Naked Gun" films, and while it's nice that he brought the hilarious Leslie Nielsen along for the ride, the film seems stuck in nibbly homage mode, when what Zucker really needs is bite. "Scary Movie 3" tries to mine laughs out of recent horror films like "The Others," rapper Eminem's film debut and wonky alien invasion films like "Signs," but instead of exploding with creative ideas, the film implodes, never really sure if it should stick with a single target or expand its scope to include dated jokes about "American Idol."

Part of the problem is that as soon as funny characters are brought on (Queen Latifah and Eddie Griffin in a unfocused, but funny "Matrix: Reloaded" bit; Darrell Hammond as a lustful priest), they're never seen again. Any life they brought with them quickly drains away again as the movie keeps returning to the leads, Ana Faris (less funny than in the two previous films) and Simon Rex, an actor who sucks humor out of every scene as if he wasn't let in on any of the jokes.

Zucker brings the film his trademark silliness — there's a lot less sexual humor and gross-out gags than in the two previous films, and that's not a bad thing. But Zucker's toothless style doesn't fit when it's making fun of films much smarter than itself. Films like "The Naked Gun" and "Airplane!" deftly fired on bloated and worn Hollywood genres. "Scary Movie 3" thinks it's funny to bring an all-star roster of rappers together only to have them all shoot each other before battling aliens in the finale. The jokes are obvious and stale.

And if you haven't seen "The Ring," or "Signs," you'll probably be lost. Much of the movie's humor depends on knowledge of those movies, and while the film recreates their visual style, it never goes far enough in using that to create real laughs.

"Scary Movie 3" is a disappointment given its hilarious trailer — there was hope that Zucker could lift the franchise up from the dirty jokes and lame sight gags of the Wayans' films. It turns out Shawn, Marlon and Keenen Ivory Wayans had the right idea all along.