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This week’s TV picks
Child stars Joey Lawrence and Melissa Joan Hart (center) are all grown up and on ABC Family on Tuesday.
Monday:
‘Lie to Me’ 8 p.m., Fox: A bunch of cast members from ‘The Shield’ turn up in a death-row case.
‘Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch’ 7 p.m., VH1: The remaining six contestants are pampered in what I sincerely hope is not a double-entendre.
‘Dating in the Dark’ 9 p.m., ABC: Playboy playmate Summer Altice competes. And they stick her in the dark. Now you know why network television is in trouble.
Tuesday:
‘Melissa and Joey’ 7 p.m., ABC Family: Melissa Joan Hart! Joey Lawrence! New series! ‘90s flashback!
‘Shaq Vs.’ 8 p.m., ABC: Shaq takes on Rachel Ray and Tyson Gay. What … no Michael Bay, Tina Fey or Dr. J?
‘Swords: Life on the Line’ 8 p.m., Discovery: Blue sharks bug Capt. Scott. I’ll bet they swim right up next to him and hum or whistle — that drives me crazy.
‘POV’ 9 p.m., PBS: Tonight’s film is ‘Salt.’ No, not the Angelina Jolie thriller — this documentary follows photographer Murray Fredericks to South Australian salt flats. Tonight’s program also features the premiere of Story Corps’ animated short features with ‘Danny and Annie.’
Wednesday:
‘Live from Lincoln Center’ 7 p.m., PBS: Grab your coconut bra and sing along with the Tony Award-winning ‘South Pacific.’
‘Confessions; Animal Hoarding’ 8 p.m., Animal Planet: Tune in and see if you can spot that lady down the street with all of those cats.
Thursday:
‘Extreme Cuisine with Jeff Corwin’ 7 p.m., Food: I think calling green-finned eels ‘cuisine’ is pushing it, but I guess that’s why I’m not Jeff.
‘Live from the Artist’s Den’ 9 p.m., PBS: Corinne Bailey Rae performs. I just knew I’d miss a possible ‘Shaq Vs.’ contestant.
Friday:
‘Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban’ 7 p.m., ABC Family: This is the best Harry Potter film. Trust me.
‘Say Yes to the Dress: Atlanta’ 8 p.m., TLC: An indecisive bride flips a coin to make a choice on her wedding dress. I hope that’s not how she reacted when her fiancé popped the question.
‘The Soup’ 9 p.m., E!: ‘Community’ star Joel McHale makes fun of stuff and I laugh.
Saturday:
‘NFL Football’ 8 p.m., CBS: The Cowboys battle the Chargers in an exhibition game from San Diego.
Sunday:
‘The Gates’ 9 p.m., ABC: Dylan and Claire try to repair their bond. Might I suggest Duct Tape? That stuff is sticky!
‘The Spin Crowd’ 9:30 p.m., E!: This reality series premiere follows the members of a public relations firm in Hollywood. Tune in and meet the people who clog my e-mail inbox.
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