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This polo’s not for preps
To much chagrin, I used to think water polo was reserved for preppy, non-pushy athletes who try to out do one another by seeing who can pop their collar the highest while saying appalling terms like “bro” repeatedly. Well, for the most part water polo players do fit that mold, but last week I discovered kayak polo.
These guys are like water polo players, only, you don’t ever want to be caught floating up a creek without a paddle if you happen to cross paths with a kayak polo player. This is only a slight exaggeration.
I knew I had found a new favorite sport to take part in when I realized no one was yelling “Marco … Polo” or treading water like goggle-wearing chums who debate over which Ivy League school is better.
It was a pack of water-bound minotaurs, chasing and charging after a ball under the Mopac bridge. They were half boat, half human, slapping their paddles in the hunt like an agitated bull paws at the ground.
As I ran over the bridge, I was surprised that throngs of people were not flocking to the sport. The people didn’t even really stop and stare at the little known sport. They only offered a shoulder shrug.
But this was my kind of sport.
Kayak water polo, is as it sounds, water polo played in kayaks, with each team trying to score the most goals. But leave those regal Ralph Lauren shirts at home.
The action is intense as players jam into rainbow-colored cluster of boats, paddles, helmets and life jackets while chasing the same ball. They play in zippy, whitewater kayaks that weigh 30 to 50 pounds.
The ball is not advanced or moved with the paddle. You’ve got to grab it with your hands and pass it, or try to paddle while you clasp it, usually in the crook of an arm. You can’t place it on your boat and you can’t hold it for more than five seconds. But you can toss it a meter or more in front of you and scoop it up again before the five-second clock starts ticking again.
Sometimes the game takes the form of bumper boats, and all the drivers of the boats just received blatantly obscene “Yo Momma” insults from opposing players. Now and then in the frenzy, one player’s kayak gets launched into the air.
The best part about this sport is that it’s within the rules and encouraged to shove an opponent if he or she is within a meter of the ball. A good shove will submerge the opponent upside down, forcing a classic Eskimo roll back to the air. It’s guaranteed to cause a thunderous belly aching laughter as well.
For more information you can contact the Austin Kayak Polo Club, an informal group of players, at 585-1015. The players usually try to meet twice a week, Wednesdays at 6:30 p.m. and Sundays at 2 p.m.
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