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Divorce
August 11, 2011
Staying organized and custody sharing
Juggling shared custody is tough, especially as kids get older and have after-school activities.
My brother is a single dad with two boys and it seems like he makes weekly trips to Target/Wal-Mart for items that his kids forgot at their moms’ houses. His oldest is in elementary school and he also spends frequent overnights at both grandparents’ houses. So my nephew has clothes at each house: underwear, socks, shorts, tops, swim trucks and tooth brush.
The dirty clothes stay at grandma’s house for future washing and the clean set goes with him to the next house. Growth spurts are a problem and as is karate, where there is just one set of special clothing and a belt that needs to be at the right house two days a week.
So, I was intrigued by this pitch for days of the week closet organizers called Organizables ($29.95). They are essentially garment bags, labeled by the day of the week. Each day has zippered pockets for shoes, jewelry, socks, etc. There’s also a weekend version ($24.95), personalized with a child’s name.
At first I though they were a bit over the top. Really, who needs to be that organized? Even my 4-year-old can get herself dressed in the morning. But for trips to Grandmas, dance class or household juggling, it could be just the thing. And who knows, as she gets more involved in activities and spends more overnights away from mom and dad, they might be just the thing.
But right now, for every day, I’m hoping that putting all of her school pieces for the day on a single hanger, will accomplish the same goal. (Shoes and socks by the door.)
What do you think? Could you use something like this?
Photo: Organizables.com
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December 15, 2008
Dads change rules on child custody
Too often, when it comes to stories about divorce the conversation rapidly turns to the subject of deadbeat dads.
Last week, the Texas Attorney General’s office trumpeted the news that they had arrested former Major League Baseball player Troy Neel on charges of evading child support, calling him the most “heinous child support evader in the state.’
According to officials, Neel, 43, who played for the Oakland Athletics from 1992 to 1994, owes $724,345 to his ex-wife, who lives in Austin. The former couple have two children, now 20 and 13 years old.
However, if you look at this article in Newsweek, there has been a gradual shift in recent decades on how dads “do” divorce.
More fathers are seeking joint physical custody and more judges are disregarding gender in courtrooms to determine where children should live, the article states. And even though the proportion of parents with such official arrangements are small, unofficially more dads are taking on greater parenting roles post-divorce.
Research to be published in the journal Family Relations in 2009 shows that there have been significant increases in how much non-resident Dads (those who don’t have primary custody) are seeing their kids. In 1976, only 18 percent of these Dads saw their children (ages 6-12) at least once a week. By 2002, that number had risen to 31 percent.
The most interesting thing about the article is that it includes a study on the satisfaction of kids with such arrangements. While joint physical custody may not work for every family, kids that have it tend to report being more satisfied than those in a more traditional every other weekend type of arrangement.
Has joint physical custody worked for you? What has been some of the pitfalls in making it work?
Permalink | Comments (9) | Categories: Divorce
