Home > Socially Awkward: My Life As Bobby Bones
Singers who don’t suck at singing
We get a lot of famous people stopping by our show. They are mostly musicians promoting their latest work. If they agree to perform live, I assume they are at least decent. If they absolutely won’t perform, I assume they are an artist who is super-produced and not any good at all.
Occasionally, we get artists who are surprisingly better than imagined. The latest is Taylor Momsen. She is the 17-year-old girl who still is part of “Gossip Girl.” If you don’t remember her from “Gossip Girl,” you may remember her as Cindy Who from “The Grinch That Stole Christmas.”
She is an actress, model and singer … and usually when that combination exists, I put parentheses around the word “singer.” Not so much this time. She wasn’t the best artist we’ve ever had. But she was surprisingly talented.
Here is a video of her (on our show, live) covering Fiona Apple’s “Criminal”:
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Super Bowl, Super Bowl
I’m writing this at 8:35 a.m. on Super Bowl Sunday. I like to bet on sports, and I love betting on the Super Bowl because of all the funny prop bets that they option out.
In an effort to be as transparent as possible, I’m going to post all my bets on my blog. And we can laugh about how awful they were later.
All these bets are $25:
Christina Aguilera will sing the National Anthem in UNDER 1 minute, 54 seconds
Christina Aguilera will not hold the note “BRAVE” at the end of the Star-Spangled Banner for under six seconds
They will show Jerry Jones LIVE on TV MORE THAN three times
They will mention Brett Favre under 2.5 times tonight
The winning team will dump the Gatorade on their coach with less than 45 seconds on the clock
The Super Bowl MVP wil thanks his teammates first
Packers (-3)
Aaron Rodgers will be Super Bowl MVP
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Bobby at the dentist …
My dentist has been suggesting I get my wisdom teeth removed for a while now. Years even. And I always found an excuse not to do it.
Until they started hurting me.
Fast forward a few weeks, and here I am after getting all four impacted wisdom teeth taken out.
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Regis update
I haven’t written in a while. Mostly because the last few weeks have been quite overwhelming. If you haven’t heard, I got to co-host an episode of ‘Live! With Regis and Kelly.’ So instead of writing a five-page essay that you’ll probably never read, I’ll just post random notes I made through the process …
Kelly Ripa was extremely nice. I had heard that she was nice and easy to work with. She was friendlier than I ever would have imagined. As I was sitting in the dressing room (60 minutes out), she came by and had a long talk with me about how much fun we were going to have. She then went into makeup and as soon as she finished, she came back and we hung out again before the show. She is as great in person as she seems on TV.
The studio audience is a fraction of the size I thought it would be. Tiny. Around eight rows deep.
The night before the taping was one of the longest nights ever. I was anxious. I was a little nervous. I was slightly freaked out. I think I got three hours of sleep. Here is a video from the morning of the show:
- I really didn’t get nervous until RIGHT WHEN WE WERE WALKING OUT. Then my insides felt like goo. Here is a video minutes before showtime when I was still somewhat normal:
- It flew by. It seems like as soon as I walked out there … the show was over. I do have some really great pictures though, courtesy of Disney/ABC. It was the quickest hour of my life.
- I was really nervous about an opening joke that I wrote. I knew that if it went well, I’d do OK. If I bombed in the first two minutes, it was going to be a long day. Luckily the joke worked. It went something like this: “This has been such a crazy trip. I’m coming to New York to do ‘Regis and Kelly.’ Then I got a crazy call in my hotel room last night. (Kelly asks, ‘What was the call?’) Turns out I’m Oprah’s half-brother.”
It got a good laugh. I was relieved.
It’s been pretty wild since I got back home. I’ve had a bunch of people reaching out about upcoming projects. Some of the people are local. I’ve even had some pretty neat calls/offers from national outlets, as well. But sadly, “The Bachelor” still hasn’t called.
KXAN was great. They followed me the entire time. Not only was I grateful for the extra local publicity, but I made some good friends in the process
- And thanks to everyone who clicked on that website to support me. I really appreciate it.
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Regis and Kelly
There was a contest introduced a few weeks ago to guest host “Live! with Regis and Kelly” with Kelly Ripa while Regis Philbin went on vacation. They were looking for radio people to be nominated for the hosting spot. At the time, it was a pipe dream. But I linked it to my sites (bobbybones.com, Facebook, Twitter) and hoped I’d at least make the Top 100.
The Thursday before two weeks of holiday vacation, they announced that Top 100. And … I made it. So that was pretty cool.
There was little chance of me moving on though. Basically because there are a lot of national shows on this list, and shows in much bigger cities.
Skip forward a few days. I’m on the treadmill at the Lifetime Fitness in South Austin. I’m listening to music on my phone and heard it ringing. I looked down to see a New York area code. I freaked out a little, but really didn’t know if it was “Regis and Kelly.”
It was.
A producer for the show did a phone interview with me. He asked me to send him a 30-second pitch tape of why I wanted to be on the show. I figured most guys would stand in front the camera and say how awesome and funny they were. So I went with a different approach.
I wrote a dorky 30-second song about why it would be neat if I got on … so my mom could see me on TV.
They cut 100 to 10. And I made the cut again. Unreal.
If I make the Top 5, I get to host an entire “Regis and Kelly” show in New York with Kelly. So I’m asking you to go and register and vote for me. And vote over and over.
If for nothing else, Austin pride. The other shows are big time. Nationally syndicated. Hosts of ESPN ‘Sportscenter.’ Guys from NYC.
And then there is me. Representing Austin.
Thanks for your support.
B
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Holiday message from Bobby
It’s the holiday season, so I have a lot of time off. And I usually stay bored the entire time.
Since we aren’t on the air on 96.7 KISS-FM, I made a holiday message for everyone who needs their “dork fix”:
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‘Tis the season…
We do things on our show to give back. And, during the holidays, we have our listeners nominate families that are in need. We spend about a week going through the thousands of submissions until we have 10 or so. It’s impossible to pick the “most deserving,” but we do our best to pick the submissions that touch us personally.
We have great sponsors that help us with getting these families what they need and want for their kids for Christmas. And every year, unsolicited, we have great listeners who help, as well. Here is an e-mail that my promotions director sent me yesterday.
Pretty touching stuff for someone just listening to the show to reach out like this …
Bobby,
Just wanted to share —
Yesterday we gave away the last KISSmas Wish to Laura — single mom with 5 children — this year she lost her job, her car, and really doesn’t have much for her kids right now.
She recently moved them into their first home (a rent-controlled apartment) but they have no furniture — including beds.
When she came up to the station to pick up the Wish Package, she practically choked Mary Ann (our receptionist) while hugging her.
SO — after the show — I got an email from a listener named Debbie.
Debbie and her husband purchased five twin beds for Laura’s family this year for Christmas.
They listen to the show every day and just wanted to help out — no recognition needed.
It’s pretty amazing to watch our listeners support each other like that.
I’m thankful for our KISS family!
OK, im going to quit crying and go back to work.
— Abby
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Tacky Sweater Party …
Check out A-List photos from the party
I wanted to take this space and post some pictures and comments about the Tacky Sweater Party we had last night.
- We had about 1,200 people show up to our party. And there really were some amazing sweaters. Also, it was really easy to approach an attractive stranger at the event. A simple “That is an awesome sweater” usually did the trick.
- The Far East Movement have that song “Like a G6” that’s played on the radio every 10 seconds. I didn’t know much about them leading up to the event. But they were awesome. They came out in space suits and had the crowd jumping the entire 30-minute set.
- Here’s a picture of Lunchbox, myself and Carlos at Maria Maria before the event.
- I had a “one of a kind” bedazzled Christmas vest. Turns out it wasn’t exactly “one of a kind.”
- Thanks again to everyone for coming out last night. We sold it out quick, and the party was awesome. It’s great to live in a city where over a thousand people embrace looking foolish
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Fantasy football, and friends
It’s the semi-finals of our fantasy football playoffs, and I’m a little sad. Not because I’m already out of it (because I’m not). But because with the end of fantasy football comes the end of a yearly camaraderie between my closest friends and I.
A little about our league … It’s a group of my best 11 (plus me) friends: pro athletes, radio people, comedy writers, engineers, etc. All who pay a decent wage to get in the league. All pretty knowledgeable about sports. And every single one of them is passionate about their stupid fantasy football teams. I’ll be the first to admit that it’s geeky (at the level I’m involved). But as far as competing in sports goes, this is all I have left!
Sports is a passion for me. I don’t get to talk about it much on the radio because of the kind of talk show we do. But when I’m off the air, it’s what I invest my time in most. I played high school football and baseball. And even sniffed around a little in college, as well. But in college came the real world of not being big, fast, or skilled enough to make money playing a sport. I chose to make money by talking on the radio. And by winning the occasional fantasy football check.
On Sundays, I sit down with my NFL Sunday Ticket and am basically a stress ball from the noon game, to the 3 p.m. game, then the Sunday night game. And, if applicable, the Monday night game.
I saw on “Oprah” (yeah, I watch that, too) where the average man watches between 3-4 hours of football a week. Well, including college, Im putting in around 15-17 hours a week. And if you count the amount of time I spend reading practice reports, player profiles of the guys on my roster, and weather conditions on Sundays (all for my fantasy team) … it goes way beyond that. As you can see, I am at an unhealthy level of fantasy football. It starts on Tuesday and goes until the next week. And when I lose a week, I stay upset about it until the next Sunday comes.
But it goes deeper than sports. It gives all of us guys a reason to hang out, a reason to talk on the phone, basically a reason to be closer to one another. As cheesy as it sounds, we are all extremely close for the 13-16 weeks of fantasy football. And as much as we like football, as much as we like gambling, and as much as we like to trash talk on the message board … (they may never admit it) I feel like we also enjoy the ability to just reach out and talk. And that’s not something guys do a lot of.
Of course, all the conversations MUST start something like this, “You’re such an idiot for starting XXX player” or, “You want to make a trade?” Then onto the real-life, friend-like stuff …
I’m also putting myself at risk for being made fun of, relentlessly, on our message board for writing this article. So I’ll add that I’ve won the league the last two years, and I’m in the final four teams again this year. Here is last week’s game screen:
Geek notes: We play in a 12-team, non-PPR. Traditional scoring. Rosters freeze after Week 12. I also write articles, and make video newscasts of each week’s league results.
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Man Uggs: The update and video
The last time I posted here, I wrote about Man Uggs. How I thought they looked cool. And how I had recently ordered a pair online. Since then, I’ve worn them every day. And they are pretty much like pillows on your feet.
After my last post, I received such comments as …
No self-respecting guy would ever wear those chick shoes.
Those Uggs will looks great with your denim skirt.
What color panties do you wear with those shoes?
I can take the criticism. It’s all I do, actually. I pretty much just listen to people tell me how much I suck every day.
So without any further ado, here is my Man Uggs video:
If you read the comments on the YouTube page, the tone has surely changed.
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I’m a sucker for a celebrity endorsement
Looks like I’m going to buy some UGGs for men. All because Tom Brady actually looks pretty cool wearing them. Before Tom, I’d have never thought about wearing UGGs. Now, it feels OK.
It’s odd that I am still a sucker for celebrity product endorsements, considering a portion of my income also comes from doing product endorsements. Instead of being embarrassed by the celebrity product sway, I took a few minutes and listed all of the other celebrities who have convinced me to buy a product during my lifetime.
Mr. T Breakfast Cereal: Mr. T was awesome. It was a toss-up between him and the Ultimate Warrior as to who was the baddest dude on TV during my childhood. But the Ultimate Warrior didn’t have a cereal. Mr. T’s cereal was basically a knock-off of Cap’n Crunch and after a while my mom said she couldn’t find that cereal any longer. So it was too expensive, or they stopped making it. Either way, I loved that cereal. And it was all because of Mr. T on the front of that box with his finger in my face. Pitying me if I didn’t eat his cereal.
Reese’s Pieces: When I was a kid, I loved ET. And ET ate Reese’s Pieces. And if my favorite alien liked a candy, so did 5-year-old Bobby. Each time we would stop at a store, I’d beg my mom for a bag (even though I hated peanut butter). Eventually I just substituted M&Ms. But I still did the alien voice.
The George Foreman Grill: I was able to cook in my 10-square-foot dorm room. And it was “healthy,” and not to mention pretty good tasting. I’ve only ordered two things off of TV ever: the Ab Shocker and the Foreman Grill. Kudos to you, grill, for those easy-to-cook hamburgers from age 18-21 (and for not leaving burn marks on my abs).
Dr. Dre’s BEATS headphones: This one is a little more recent than the others. They look cool. and if Dr. Dre looks cool wearing something, so will I. So, I spent too much for a pair of headphones that I don’t use that often. These headphones are also battery powered. I constantly leave them on, and when its time to use them again, the batteries are dead. And I guess I don’t really need a pair of headphones to look hip-hop. I’m pretty street naturally.
Wranglers: I haven’t bought a pair of Wranglers yet. But I want to. Brett Favre makes them seem real freaking comfortable. And who doesn’t love a pair of pants you can play touch football in?
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Great boy bands. That’s not an oxymoron.
Photos: Red carpet at the AMAs
Photos: Scenes from the AMAs ceremony
I watched all of the AMAs. That’s pretty rare for me, because …
1) It’s a lame awards show that picks its winner by Internet votes. (See: Justin Bieber winning every award.)
2) It didn’t end until 10 p.m. (I go to bed at 8.)
I was up, much like most other women aged 25-45, waiting for the New Kids on the Block/Backstreet Boys joint performance from heaven. And it didn’t disappoint. It was as awful and as wonderful as I was expecting. I would love to link the video here from last night, but Dick Clark Productions continues to pull them off the web pretty quick.
Just trust me on how awful and awesome it was. I would go to this reunion concert. The cool guy in me would like to say, “I’d love to go JUST for all the ladies that will be there.” But the honest guy in me must admit that I still love to sing these songs.
So I’ve listed the top five boybands of my lifetime. This is my list. Not your list. Because mine probably isn’t in line with the rest of the world.
5. O-Town
They were the original “Making the Band” group. And I watched every episode of it. They were also one of the first pop groups that I met and spent a good amount of time with. Yep, I went clubbing with O-Town. I used to think that was so cool. (I still do.)
4. New Kids on the Block
Jessica Wilson was a red-headed girl in fourth grade who wouldn’t be my girlfriend. Jessica was missing two buttons from her New Kids on the Block button set. I hunted those suckers down and gave them to her as a gift. She was then my girlfriend for a week or so. Thanks, New Kids.
3. Backstreet Boys
My ex-girlfriend dated Nick Carter right before she dated me. That was weird. But I did love this song. And it was on “TRL” so much that I actually learned the hat dance they did in the video. And by “it was on ‘TRL’ so much,” I actually mean that I recorded it and practiced it over and over in my dorm.
2. LFO
The only reason they make #2 is because “Summer Girls” is so freaking awesome. One song carried them to the #2 spot in the lineup. It also launched goofy white boy-banders who thought they could rap. And I still know every word to this song. I like to show off if it accidentally comes on somewhere (like my car). Impressive, I know.
1. N Sync
I met the guys from N Sync a few times. They were always great to hang out with. Even Justin. Also, Lance Bass was really nice to my 10-year-old sister before a concert. Not to mention they definitely had the best song list of all the boy bands. And a special mention to Joey Fatone. Did he do anything in Nsync? Other than look like their dad who danced in the background. Here is my favorite song…
Follow me on Twitter: @mrbobbybones
Latest comments
Great job on Regis and Kelly. How about YOU replacing Regis? TOO funny watching the video of you at the dentist. Wonder why/who took it down? :(
... read the full comment by Doug Wright | Comment on Bobby at the dentist ... Read Bobby at the dentist ...
if i had been there i would have been laughing so hard that I couldnt stop shaking the camera. very funny. no wonder he has the #1 show in town.
nice job on Regis and Kelly as well. I heard its leading to other national TV appearances.
... read the full comment by Fleaman the Goblin | Comment on Bobby at the dentist ... Read Bobby at the dentist ...
Hey man, just saw the show and the extra online video. Show was awesome dude, hope you had a blast doing it!
... read the full comment by Aaron | Comment on Regis and Kelly Read Regis and Kelly
hey man. great show. I use to listen to 2 old guys on the rock station. but you are my favorite show now.
... read the full comment by Jay | Comment on Holiday message from Bobby Read Holiday message from Bobby
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