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'Hal-O-ween' - A poem by Kate Kamper

By Kate Kamper
SPECIAL TO THE AMERICAN-STATESMAN
Thursday, October 30, 2008

'Hal-O-ween'

The boy named Hal was a demon,

Though his mother said of him, preening,

'He pulls arms from toys,

But boys will be boys,

And no real harm comes from his scheming.'

Most kids at his school disagreed.

'A liar, a thief and a cheat.

He takes all our money,

Black eyes he thinks funny -

From this villain we must be freed.'

Halloween was Hal's favorite day.

Tricks and treats, chocolate bars, school cupcakes.

But every year beaten

By nerdy Ned Sneed in

The contest of costumes they made.

'You beat us with fists,' Ned bombasted,

'But I win the ribbons in classes.

Though havoc you wreak,

Your future's as bleak

As moonless mist midnight morasses.'

So on that day, October 30th,

Hal walked home from school at his surliest.

He said there and then,

'Oh, this year I'll win,

Paying price whatever worthy it.'

Thunder clapped over his shoulder.

There looking, he saw on a boulder

A costume so fine,

'I'll have it! It's mine!

Nothing could look more gargoyler.'

A dragon's face worn like a hat

With downy veined wings of a bat.

An 'H' and an 'E'

Then hockey sticks be

The place for an outfit like that.

The next day the kids said 'How fitting.

A devil on Hal's head is sitting.'

Each one guffawed

(Though secretly awed)

And knew that first place he'd be getting.

One transparent wing gave a shudder,

Then snap! Came a flap of the other.

Kids sped from the room

As if 'twere a tomb -

Hal's voice through thin bloodless lips uttered:

'Come back with my prize, Mrs. Pulkiss,

I know that my costume's the coolest.'

Expressions like Hal's,

His laugh and mean smiles,

Crept onto this visage of ghoulness.

He smelled the kids' fear like a scent,

And by sniffing, found out where they went.

He grabbed one! She said,

'That mask's now your head.

'Tis justice, you impudent imp.'

Hal realized her meaning in full,

Then tore at the mask like a bull.

Despite all his cursing,

It stuck to his person,

And bled from each place that he'd pull.

Hal flew to his home - was he dreaming?

His own mother threw him out, screaming.

Before two days time,

(And the end of this rhyme,)

The boy named Hal was a demon.

Moral:

So if you see half-boy, half-demon

While you're out at night trick-or-treating,

Remember this story

And Hal's end (how gory!)

And never behave so unseeming.

Postcript:

'The Other Halves'

Hal's head with the imp's body came,

When Hal's mother called out his name.

Thought it spoke in screeches,

It fit in his breeches,

And she loved the thing just the same.